Monday, November 21, 2005

Gen. Casey Submitts Cut and Run Plan to Rumsfeld

The top US commander in Iraq submitted a plan to Defense Secretary Rumsfeld on Friday outlining plans to begin the withdrawal of US troops starting early next year. Gen. George Casey, who submitted the plan, was quickly called a coward by House Republicans who accused him of trying to “cut and run”.

“This is like telling the insurgents we surrender,” said Kansas Representative Felix Danderwell, “and it really sends mixed messages to our troops. How are they suppose to know we support them unless we at home are willing to risk all of their lives in a decades long experiment in poorly planned nation building? I tell you this is NOT the armed forces I remember getting 15 deferments from during the Vietnam war!”

Georgia House Republican Dionne Vapors echoed fellow member Danderwell. “Just where does Gen. Casey get off submitting appeasement plans to the Secretary of Defense?” asked Vapors. “I think he should be using less white flags and more white phosphorus. If I had allowed either of my sons go within a hundred miles of an Army or Marine recruiter, I’d be ashamed that they were being led by this General Casey, who has the gall to consider letting Iraqis rule themselves.”

“This is just another example of the cut and run attitude that endangers the President’s great successes in Iraq,” said Republican Representative Morty Tucks of Texas. “We prefer a 'stay and pay' policy, wherein we keep dropping truly unimaginable amounts of money into the yawning abyss that is Iraq, in the hopes of gaining incremental improvements. So far it’s worked wonders and America can take pride in the democracy we’ve created for all Iraqi’s. Well, at least those who haven't been blown up by suicide bombers.”


Blogger fallenmonk said...

I see you managed to find a good way to use your "stay and pay". Good work. Maybe we can get this into ongoing dialogue. Giving you all credit, of course.

5:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Stay and pay" is a good way to describe it. I like the names: Danderwell, Vapors, Tucks. Who are these people?

7:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not that I was watching TV, but I still happened to catch the last minute of Monday Night Football and see your beloved team, the Packers, lose in the last second to the Vikings. That must've hurt. Ouch!

9:16 PM  
Blogger OldRoses said...

I say "Bomb them back to the Stone Age!". Oh, wait. The insurgents are already doing that.

10:44 PM  
Blogger Isaac Carmichael said...

Bloddy Vikings!

5:36 PM  
Blogger Sylvana said...

I see the "Iraqi War" as a huge money funneler to Haliburton. It is a great way for them to just syphon all America's money right into their coffers. Soon, only Haliburton will have money and we'll all be working for the company store.

7:51 PM  

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