Reason for World Naked Bike Ride Protest Lost in all the Nudity
Yet another repeat, lovingly brought back to life from 6/14/05. No need to thank me, just enjoy
The World Naked Bike Ride held on June 11th may have been flawed, due to the fact that all the nude people on bikes distracted from the protest’s goal of publicizing the world’s dependency on oil.
Matt Sugarman, who observed the ride in Seattle WA, said he couldn’t remember what the protest was about. “I’m, like, sitting there and three girls go by, totally buck naked! Riding bikes! If you’re telling me it was about oil, fine, it’s just my mind kind of went blank after I spotted the first nipple!”
Rebecca Collinsworth of Naperville IL, said several of the Chicago male bikers stopped to chat about the reason for their protest. “I should have been paying attention to what they were saying,” Collinsworth said, “I think they were talking about how we are a society that depends too much on gas and oil, but I’m not sure. All my concentration was going into not staring at their penises.”
One of the riders in the Austin TX protest, Burt Anderson said he hoped that riding a bike naked down a city street would show people that there are alternatives to gas powered vehicles. “The nudity is just a way to draw people’s attention," said Anderson, "hopefully some of them realize they can give up these poison belching monstrosities and get to work while getting in shape!” Austin resident Janice Tucker, who saw Anderson ride said, “Well I tell you what, I wasn’t thinking about alternative transportation when he passed me and rounded the corner. I just kept thinking the dude should keep an ass that pale and hairy covered up.”