Thursday, August 11, 2005

Overheard at Political Capital Collections Dept.- Station 16


Hello, is this Mr. George W. Bush? Good morning sir, my name is Jennifer Turner, I’m a collections representative for your Political Capital account. Yes sir, our records show your account is currently past due and we were wondering when you plan on making a payment. I see sir, yes, I’m sure clearing brush takes up a lot of time, but as you are aware, the longer you delay in repaying the more harm you do to your political credit record.

I assure you our figures are correct Mr. Bush. No, it’s not an error due to the internets. As you recall you drew down a substantial portion of your political capital for privatizing social security. We also show an excessive outlay on your fly-in to Washington to sign the Terri Schiavo bill. And your account has shown an ongoing drain due to the progress of the war in Iraq. Yes sir, our records do show your reelection, but I’m afraid your margin of victory was not large enough to cover these expenditures. Yes sir, well I’m sorry your Mr. Rove misinformed you about that, but I’m afraid we do need payment immediately.

That is correct Mr. Bush, refinancing would be an option but I’m afraid you’ve done that several times already. Yes sir, once you found out there were no Iraqi weapons of mass destruction. Right and when your staff revealed a covert CIA operative. What’s that? Again sir, we have no opinion of Mr. Wilson, one way or another, we are only responsible for your Political Capital account.

No, we did not receive a check from you last Thursday. I’m afraid we did not receive a money order either. Nor do we have a record of any travelers checks sir. Look Mr. Bush, I’m afraid unless you arrange some kind of payment we will be forced to return control of the House and Senate to the Democrats after mid-term elections. I’m afraid we CAN do that sir. How does President Hillary Clinton sound to you Mr. Bush? I see, so then we’ll receive payment tonight from some oil companies? Excellent Mr. President. Yes sir, you too. And let us know how Political Capital can help you in the future.

5 Comments:

Anonymous Snake said...

When you've spent, and overspent, your political capital, there's only one solution: Another tax cut for the rich and famous.

9:34 AM  
Blogger Sylvana said...

I think that could work Snake. People seem to fall for it everytime.

DrMax, you have truly outdone yourself with this! :))

12:27 PM  
Blogger OldRoses said...

So why doesn't he just call his mother? I hear she's got one hell of a rolodex.

8:18 PM  
Blogger Michele's Mumblings said...

I haven't been so amused since Spring Break and the great wet boxer contest!

11:23 PM  
Blogger Herge Smith said...

That Bush aye? Always getting into trouble - oh well, i guess the folks can help bail him out again!

5:47 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home