Friday, May 13, 2005

George Lucas Is Ok With This, Really

Hey this is OK with me, really. I WANT characters I took years in creating to look like M&M Candies. Honestly I’m fine with it! Star Wars Chocolate Mpire, get it? Like Empire, but Mpire, ‘cause of the M&Ms.

Wait, it’s stupid isn’t it? I’ve sold my unique vision just to promote my film! Oh God, what was I thinking? Isn’t a gabillion bucks enough for one person?! What the hell has happened to me? I made THX 1138 for crying out loud! And now I’m selling CANDY?

But you know, the small kids seem to like this kind of approach. The actual Star Wars films, especially this last one, are a little scary. This is a way the toddlers can enjoy the excitement of a new release just like their older brothers and sisters. Yeah, why should they be left out? And heh heh, they are kinda cute with the little helmets and the.....

WHAT AM I SAYING?! Can’t little kids buy all the toys I carpet bomb Target and K-Mart with? Why do I need a candy tie-in too? Oh, how did I end up here? Me, auteur of nonlinear student films now pushing sugar laden confection on unsuspecting four year olds! Why oh why did I come up with that idiotic space story in the first place?

What is wrong with you George you....hold it, what’s this? An envelope from M&M/Mars? I’ll just open ‘er up and.....HELLO! Oh baby, CHA-CHING! So anyway, Star Wars Chocolate Mpire, what a SUPER idea! Why not go out and pick up a Revenge of the Sith collector’s package today!!!

G. Lucas


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