Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Evil Criminal Mastermind Delivers Ultimatum


Greetings, my name is Count Vanderiech. I have taken control of this blog. Oh, do not bother switching to another site, I am afraid that would be quite useless. For I have taken over all the Internet to deliver to the world my ultimatum!

Unless the amount of 40 trillion dollars is transferred to my Swiss bank account by noon tomorrow, I will use this laptop computer to launch all armed nuclear missiles on this planet!

Oh, it was really quite simple for someone of my advanced intelligence to gain control of all the launch codes, your Internet made it mere child's play to....wait. What the? Why has my screen gone blue? Hold on, get Phil up here. No, not Phil from shipping, Phil from tech support!

Anyway..I...if I can just get this reboot to work...I will certainly cause a great deal of havoc on all the....SON OF A... this stupid thing! Phil, thank God, what the hell is going on with this laptop? YES! I did a reboot! But all I got was the lousy blue screen...safe mode? O.K. but....DAMN, blue screen AGAIN....NO, I DID NOT DO A BACK-UP!!! I CAN NOT BELIEVE THIS!!!

O.K., world, look I'll have to get back to you on the ultimatum thing, I'm on hold with the laptop manufacturer's help desk and I don't want to miss it if they pick up...HELLO? At last, yes I'm....customer I.D. number? What's that? All I see is a product and serial number, no I.D. number! No wait, don't put me on HOLD again I......CRAP!!

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